A giftedness self-test

I'm shortening this stolen article so that it only contains a respectable amount of quotes and a link back to the source, and color. :) Cheerio! (I just watched Wallace and Gromit.)

Even if you have doubts about the extent of your giftedness, you will really bring your talents to life if you will embrace your drive to become, serve, create, achieve, and contribute.

Self-recognition is not to fuel egotism or elitism, but to align with a more powerful, creative part of you that will let your heart, your knowledge, your talent loose on the world. Mary Rocamora, founder and director of Rocamora

1. General Characteristics

• Do you have a large vocabulary?
• Are you multi-talented?
• Do you have so many interests and abilities that it is hard to focus your energies on developing any of them to your satisfaction?
• Are you possessed of an unrelenting (and possibly off-the wall) sense of humor?
• Can you occupy time usefully without external stimulation?
• Are you persistently goal-directed in your behavior?
• Is your creativity apparent in all areas of endeavor?
• Do you have the need and the energy to develop more capacity?

2. Entelechy

Derived from the Greek word for having a goal, entelechy is a particular type of motivation, need for self-determination, and an inner strength and vital force directing life and growth to become all one is capable of being. Gifted people with entelechy are often attractive to others who feel drawn to their openness and to their dreams and visions. Being near someone with this trait gives others hope and determination to achieve their own self-actualization.

(Deirdre Lovecky, "Warts and Rainbows: Issues in the Psychotherapy of the Gifted", Advanced Development, Jan., 1990)

• Are you directed by an inner vision of your purpose in life, or have a dream that is all-consuming?
• Are you highly motivated to be all you are capable of being?
• Are you deeply involved in creating your own destiny?
• Do you continue to believe in yourself and your vision, even when no one else does?
• Are others attracted to your vision, wanting to participate?

I love the word "entelechy!" If you do too, you're probably gifted, but just to be sure, check out the rest of the self test at Rocamora.org.

Polygamy and the Man Shortage :)

This is the comment I left at Feminist Mormon Housewives on Lisa’s Ultimate Polygamy Post

Well, I might feel differently if I were married, but I can sort of get the polygamy thing, not really the Mormon version, but the I-have-several-sisters-and-best-friends-that-I'm-sealed-to-forever, and what the heck, a lover or two or three. Growing up Mormon, I thought the idea of polygamy was harsh, but when I got to college and had boyfriends when my friends did not, I wanted to share my boyfriends for all the non-sexual things guys can do- dancing, walking arm in arm, carrying heavy things, and even comforting guy hugs. Men just have an energy that I like and if my girlfriends didn't have a man, then I had an urge to share! I can also be very jealous if I don't feel like the primary person in my guy's life. I think my generousity was based on feeling securely loved. I can even imagine in another time and place that I wouldn't mind my husband having sex with someone else (ok, that's a real stretch!) if I was still his alpha and omega. That's sort of where the idea of polygamy breaks down for me, not everyone can be alpha and omega. Ok, if I'm in heaven and there's no men left, and my husband is unwaveringly in love with me, and there is a lonesome woman up there, and we can't just create another man for her or borrow one from a distant galaxy, I would be willing to share. I admit it. I can't help it! It would be suck to be lonesome for all eternity. Is this why the Gods kept coming down from Olympus to have affairs with mortals?

ps: I just accidentally published this on an old school blog!!! I deleted it quick, hopefully quick enough! Otherwise, ummm, yeah, hi old classmates.

The bear people

I'm one of those people who have seasonal affective disorder, with the fantastically appropriate acronym: SAD. Below is an article if you want to read more about it. Basically, when the days get shorter, people with SAD feel more sleepy, less social, and they want to eat lots of carbohydrates. They want to hibernate. They are the bear people.

Hibernating is inconvenient in this modern world, and I'm all for flouting mother nature on this one, but let's be real, it's not a disorder, it's a normal reaction to the change in season. You want to hole up, put on some weight for the winter, and sleep more. I could happily spend the winter season in a warm, bright house with my family, and all the food we stored for the winter. I'd read, and listen to Pa play the fiddle. Just don't ask me to go out, and don't ask me to do anything. I think the interesting thing is people in the general population whose pineal glands mistake artificial light for sunlight and don't have that reaction, that's a disorder! But it's a helpful and convenient one.

Exposure to sunlight or a lightbox in the morning helps many people. There is an article in this month's Scientific America about it. I have a light box, but when I moved to a sunnier place I didn't think I'd need it. I'm going to get up at 7 every morning and take a walk, hopefully that will help my body pretend I shouldn't be hibernating. Good luck bear people!

Here's an article about SAD on a buy-your-term-paper website. (Can you imagine writing term papers for your job? Ugh.)

The Center for Environmental Therapeutics has a good questionaire about SAD. I took the quiz and it told me that the best time for me to do light therapy is at 7AM! I don't know how they came to that conclusion, but for years my gut instinct has been that 7AM is my optimal waking up time.

NAMI (The National Alliance on Mental Illness) has a good overview article about SAD.

Me and Dooce are on the same cycle or why I missed the computer simulation about system models

Things I'm not good at: remembering what people's cars look like, having any idea when my period is coming.

My first clue is when I suddenly start crying and feel that life is really not worth living and wondering how I will make it through the next 80 or so years. So, last night my teacher says something to me and it makes me cry. Luckily only one side of me is weak; my right side. I don't know what this means, but sometimes if I am trying not to cry but can't help crying, only my right eye will cry. This is very useful if I'm a passenger in a car, as I've had many opportunities to discover. One side of me can be relentlessly leaking while I'm carrying on a normal conversation with the ignorant driver.

Last night, I tried to pass off my crying as something in my eye, and this could have been a success. I also used my time honored tradition of thinking of a rock. I don't know why this works for me , but it helps. I even drew a picture of a rock on my notebook paper. Yes, I'm a 30-something master's student and I was trying not to cry in class by repeating everything my professor said in my head while looking at a picture of a rock, so I didn't have time to say to myself, "Nobody likes me!" As I said, this could have worked. Then my professor, who had continued teasing me, 'cause we're just that kind of fun loving class and I can (usually) take it, came up to me during the break and said with his kind little eyes, "You know I was kidding, right?" My averted eyes and non-committal mumble caused him to repeat. Then my classmate next to me tried to joke with me. I had to hurry and leave. Don't look at me with kind eyes when I'm thinking, "rock!"

I rushed down 3 flights of stairs to a bathroom in the basement that I found when I was new and didn't know where my classes were. Yes, it was where I remembered it from 2 years ago. The whites of my eyes were both bright red, and I started sobbing witht he gasping breaths and everything. Then it was just unrecoverable. My face was blotchy and wet and the sight of my crumpling face in the mirror was making me laugh between sobs. Then someone knocked at the unisex bathroom door. A man with a long beard, a red bandana, and some peircings was leaning against the wall waiting. I hoped he didn't think the unflushed stuff in the toilet was from me.

Outside I was suprised by a beautiful sunset, which always helps. The air was crisp and I walked quickly towards my car, thinking, "I'll look in the mirror of my car and if I can look like I wasn't crying I'll go back to class." Unfortunately, I got in a crowded elevator full of psychologists. They were talking about feelings and how you should just express them. Everyone got off at another floor except me, and one little dark-haired lady. Do you know how you can hold it together as long as no one speaks to you? Or if they at least speak to you in an impersonal tone of voice? "Are you ok?" She asks me. Still, I manage to nod and not cry. "Do you want to talk about it?" I don't know what I mumbled. "It it helps, I am a psychologist." Well, thanks a lot lady. Now you've done it. I just started sobbing, my crumpled blotchy face beyond help. True to form, I felt despair of life ever being worth living for the rest of the night, and to top it off, Tivo messed up and did not record Gilmore Girls. Sometimes it's the little things that count. I have to go back to class tonight with the same proffesor. The friend I went crying to, who also made me cry again, has advised me to say that I had a lot going on that day and had to leave, and that's why I missed the computer simulation about system models.

Bitter grateful

Today as I was stretching in NIA, after we were dancing to music as we thought of something/s we're really greatful for, I thought, "I'm going to think of what I'm greatful for everyday. I'm going to post everything I'm greatful for on my blog! I'll do it everyday until the end of the year! I'm going to rename my blog 'Braidwood Praises,' or "Braidwood Thanks.' " Sometimes I'm just TOO much!

Well, I just read my email, and I am going to have to amend my posting strategy. First I'll post everything I'm bitter about, then I'll post greatful. That will work much better.

Bitter:
GA! Everyone is nominating my co-chair for our church's outstanding service award!!! This is very annoying for many reasons. Most of all it is annoying because I was going to nominate her- I had no thought of myself- really. But I thought I would nominate her in private so it wouldn't look like an inside job because we are co-chairs. I was feeling all proud of her and glad she would be nominated. And then at our meeting someone else publicly nominated her, and someone else seconded it and now she just thanked two more people who nominated her on our email list!! Well isn't that sweet. Here I am having long email conversations with people who: don't like the way we vote, don't understand how our list works, need such and such, and she is emailing a thank you to her many admirers. I really like my co-chair. (GA!) and like how we work together, so I knew I had to get this out somewhere. Again, GA! This is so irritating. I'm finally sympathizing with that protoypical invisible office worker who really runs everything but gets no credit. Oh yes, I have worked long effective hours. So, I ran a bad meeting once. GA!!!

Oh yeah, and I'm greatful for:
The rain, the cuddly cat, warm Mexican style chicken soup, Gilmore girls, that people let me be their co-chair (GA!!!) ok scratch that one for now, my fun projects I am working on, my talents, that I like dancing, the fun parties I went to this weekend, that my friend came to NIA with me, that I have fun Christmas and Thanksgiving plans, my new NLP guide. GA! Goddammit, give me some credit! (Sorry, sudden reversion to bitter.) And... I'm very greatful I did not give this link to my church group!! Ha! :) People who have it, and you know who you are, SILENCE!