Saturday, December 31, 2005
Thursday, December 29, 2005
This is Pi. I found this little kitten outside on my mom's picnic table a couple days ago. It is part of the posse of feral cats in the neighborhood, and we think it got abandoned because it was sick. My mom told me to get it out of the house immediately, but it had taken me 20 minutes to catch this wild cat and I wasn't going to just put it back out in the cold. (It was very cold.) I took slow motion hunter like steps towards it until I was close and enough to reach out and grab it. I think I only caught it because it was sick. I brought it inside, and it was flattened out to the floor and scared. As you can see, it warmed up to me pretty soon. Pi was falling asleep in this picture.
I think I was there for it's first human induced purr. I pet it's back a couple times and it was like it's motor started for the first time. It looked surprised. It started purring this loud purr that didn't quit the whole time we had it. Eventually, after I started crying, my mom came around and let me keep it in the house and helped me find some people to help it. (I am a stranger in a strange land on Christmas vacation.) I don't think this kitten had ever eaten food besides nursing so it took it awhile to eat the cat food and cream of wheat we gave it.
It was very happy to be held, and very sad if I ever left the bathroom where we kept it, (so it wouldn't pass along whatever sickness it had to our cats). Sandy, the cat healer and rescuer, took it and assured me she would heal it up and then find Pi a home. Most of the animals we've had have been rescued and were/are part of our family. I hope Pi has a nice life. Whoever gets this playful and loving kitten will be lucky. Oh yeah, and just because you cannot save all the stray cats in the world doesn't mean you shouldn't try and save one.
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
Look: no one ever promised for sure—William Stafford
that we would sing. We have decided
to moan. In a strange dance that
we don't understand till we do it, we
have to carry on.
Just as in sleep you have to dream
the exact dream to round out your life,
so we have to live that dream into stories
and hold them close at you, close at the
edge we share, to be right.
We find it an awful thing to meet people,
serious or not, who have turned into vacant
effective people, so far lost that they
won't believe their own feelings
enough to follow them out.
The authentic is a line from one thing
along to the next; it interests us.
Strangely, it relates to what works,
but is not quite the same. It never
swerves for revenge,
Or profit, or fame: it holds
together something more than the world,
this line. And we are your wavery
efforts at following it. Are you coming?
Good: now it is time.
Wednesday, December 21, 2005
I am a proud member of my clan, and I have always wanted to do honor to my name. I would like to think that I have lived my life in a way that makes my family proud (or at least, not ashamed) to share my name. My father, in particular, always seemed so tickled when the accomplishments of his children would appear in some newspaper or another, and he never batted an eye when I did not change my name upon marriage. He raised his daughters (and his sons) to be strong, independent, thoughtful, and active—to do what we believe to be right, and do it with our heads held high. And so it was a great blow to me when my father said, upon my announcement that I would be participating permanently on FMH, “You won’t be using our name, will you?”
1. The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald
2. The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
3. The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck
4. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
5. The Color Purple by Alice Walker
6. Ulysses by James Joyce
7. Beloved by Toni Morrison
8. The Lord of the Flies by William Golding
9. 1984 by George Orwell
10. The Sound and the Fury by William Faulkner
11. Lolita by Vladmir Nabokov
12. Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck
13. Charlotte's Web by E.B. White
14. A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man by James Joyce
15. Catch-22 by Joseph Heller
16. Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
17. Animal Farm by George Orwell
18. The Sun Also Rises by Ernest Hemingway
19. As I Lay Dying by William Faulkner
20. A Farewell to Arms by Ernest Hemingway
21. Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad
22. Winnie-the-Pooh by A.A. Milne
23. Their Eyes are Watching God by Zora Neale Hurston
24. Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison
25. Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison
26. Gone with the Wind by Margaret Mitchell
27. Native Son by Richard Wright
28. One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest by Ken Kesey
29. Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut
30. For Whom the Bell Tolls by Ernest Hemingway
31. On the Road by Jack Kerouac
32. The Old Man and the Sea by Ernest Hemingway
33. The Call of the Wild by Jack London
34. To the Lighthouse by Virginia Woolf
35. Portrait of a Lady by Henry James
36. Go Tell it on the Mountain by James Baldwin
37. The World According to Garp by John Irving
38. All the King's Men by Robert Penn Warren
39. A Room with a View by E.M. Forster
40. The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien
41. Schindler's List by Thomas Keneally
42. The Age of Innocence by Edith Wharton
43. The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand
44. Finnegans Wake by James Joyce
45. The Jungle by Upton Sinclair
46. Mrs. Dalloway by Virginia Woolf
47. The Wonderful Wizard of Oz by L. Frank Baum
48. Lady Chatterley's Lover by D.H. Lawrence
49. A Clockwork Orange by Anthony Burgess
50. The Awakening by Kate Chopin
51. My Antonia by Willa Cather
52. Howards End by E.M. Forster
53. In Cold Blood by Truman Capote
54. Franny and Zooey by J.D. Salinger
55. The Satanic Verses by Salman Rushdie
56. Jazz by Toni Morrison
57. Sophie's Choice by William Styron
58. Absalom, Absalom! by William Faulkner
59. A Passage to India by E.M. Forster
60. Ethan Frome by Edith Wharton
61. A Good Man Is Hard to Find by Flannery O'Connor
62. Tender Is the Night by F. Scott Fitzgerald
63. Orlando by Virginia Woolf
64. Sons and Lovers by D.H. Lawrence
65. Bonfire of the Vanities by Tom Wolfe (This is one of the top 100?)
66. Cat's Cradle by Kurt Vonnegut
67. A Separate Peace by John Knowles
68. Light in August by William Faulkner
69. The Wings of the Dove by Henry James
70. Things Fall Apart by Chinua Achebe
71. Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier
72. A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams
73. Naked Lunch by William S. Burroughs
74. Brideshead Revisited by Evelyn Waugh
75. Women in Love by D.H. Lawrence
76. Look Homeward, Angel by Thomas Wolfe
77. In Our Time by Ernest Hemingway
78. The Autobiography of Alice B. Tokias by Gertrude Stein
79. The Maltese Falcon by Dashiell Hammett
80. The Naked and the Dead by Norman Mailer
81. Wide Sargasso Sea by Jean Rhys
82. White Noise by Don DeLillo
83. O Pioneers! by Willa Cather
84. Tropic of Cancer by Henry Miller
85. The War of the Worlds by H.G. Wells
86. Lord Jim by Joseph Conrad
87. The Bostonians by Henry James
88. An American Tragedy by Theodore Dreiser
89. Death Comes for the Archbishop by Willa Cather
90. The Wind in the Willows by Kenneth Grahame
91. This Side of Paradise by F. Scott Fitzgerald
92. Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand
93. The French Lieutenant's Woman by John Fowles
94. Babbitt by Sinclair Lewis
95. Kim by Rudyard Kipling
96. The Beautiful and the Damned by F. Scott Fitzgerald
97. Rabbit, Run by John Updike
98. Where Angels Fear to Tread by E.M. Forster
99. Main Street by Sinclair Lewis
100. Midnight's Children by Salman Rushdie
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
Monday, December 19, 2005
All Songs Considered host Bob Boilen counts down listener picks for the ten best CDs of 2005, with NPR music reviewers Will Hermes, Tom Moon and Meredith Ochs. They also share some of their own favorites from the year and take calls from listeners. This program originally webcast live on NPR.org Dec. 16, 2005.
Sunday, December 18, 2005
...I too can relate. When I was 20 and 21, I was asked out and complimented constantly from boys 16 to men 80 plus and everyone in between. I hadn't been asked out in high school at all and it was overwhelming and flattering. It was also at times very aggressive and some men did expect that since they wanted me, it was an affront to their manhood if I did not want them. Men who I could tell were not sexually attracted to me also asked me out, I think just because, as a pretty woman, I was a status symbol...The very worst part though was women who were jealous of me. They could be fairly vicious. I wanted to tell them that, contrary to their view, I was not always popular, I was not rich, I was not a cheerleader in high school. Please just let me enjoy this time of popularity without malice. I found growing older and plainer an immense relief. I gained about 20 pounds and became pretty enough to get occasional attention and pretty enough that other women wouldn't ridicule me for being ugly, but plain enough not to provoke jealousy or turned heads in the grocery store. Looks are such a mixed bag. What I wish for now, is a world in which all kinds of beauty are valued and we are all free to shine to our fullest without negative repercussions.I would sometimes like to reveal myself. I would sometimes like to just let myself be as beautiful as I can be, even decorated. I wish all the men in the world were wholesome enough for me to feel safe enough to shine. But I don't want to be the "new Venus," I want to be seen for who I am. So, I often enjoy going out without makeup and with very basic outfits, but still I am not really seen for all of who I am. There is a part of my identity that is "beautiful." It sometimes feels like a characteristic that is true no matter how I look. People who look at me and don't see that I'm beautiful just don't see very well, I think, they can't see my secret, that despite how plain I may look, I am still beautiful. When I was younger, I was exposed for all the world to see, but now I can go about secretly, a beautiful woman in disguise.
Saturday, December 17, 2005
The Mood Cure explains how you can spot a "false mood" and what nutritional deficiency that might be caused by. There are people who have structural damage to their brains which can cause personality changes, but for most people false moods or moods of any kind are caused by chemicals in the brain. You can also affect your mood with your thoughts, and with your environment (like getting enough sun,) and your behavior (like getting enough sleep,) but they affect your mood via chemical changes in your brain and "surprisingly brainlike areas of your heart and gut." The idea in the Mood Cure is that if you are severely deficient in a nutrient, you cannot produce the necessary chemicals to keep your mood steady even if you are thinking good thoughts etc. Julia Ross recommends supplements. For people who are deficient in certain nutrients because of diet, they will only need to take supplements for awhile while they are getting their diet back on track. For some people who have trouble creating certain chemicals, they may need to keep taking certain supplements.
This is one of my top 5 recommended books because it can take your experience of life from very miserable to just fine in as short a time as a week with some very simple changes in your diet and some fairly cheap supplements that you can find at any health store.
Thursday, December 15, 2005
It makes me think that for some people, life is like getting dropped off in the middle of the woods, and then year by year, gradually walking home.
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
Hmmm.. I agree with both of you. I think we should all be like medical doctors and first do no harm. After that, I think there is a lot of room for variation. I am one of those save the world types that I think Steve and Laura both are. However, the world would be very boring if there weren't the decorate and make things pretty types and the look at me aren't I beautiful types and the I'm so charming types. (I'm sure we all have a little of all of those, I know I do. Tounge in cheek aside: As Max in Sound of Music said, people aren't good or bad, they are charming or dull.)
That being said, I do think a call to action can sometimes be very healthy. Some people may need a call to action. It's all about balance. If you are a save the world type, I think it is wise to follow Laura and S. Covey's advice and focus your efforts on your area of influence rather than your area of concern and then your area of influence will grow. But first, do no harm and be kind. We save the world types can sometimes be pretty hard on other people and ourselves, at least I know I can.
If you love me, but you think you might not love me if I annoyed you, stop reading now. If you don't love me, or your love could never fail, by all means continue!
Does anyone else have a huge fear of admitting you are gifted? Who do you tell that to? I have a mostly ANONYMOUS blog and I am even worried about putting it up. I have been alluding to it on my blog lately, but not coming right out and saying it. I told my mom and she sounded skeptical!! :) She did agree emphatically that I was an independent and divergent thinker though. (What she used to call "sassy.") And I did remind her that I had read every book in the house by the time I was 10, including her college textbooks.
I just don't want to put anyone else down by implying that I'm better than them. It's taken me so long and so much work to FIT IN, that I don't want to use some word and put myself in another category. On the other hand, I'm proud of my abilities and I think I try to subtly show off sometimes, which I'm sure is annoying. On the other hand, I really do think everyone is gifted in the sense that everyone has amazing gifts! I wish there was a more value neutral label for the cluster of traits we currently call "gifted." On the other hand, why is it ok and not alienating for people to be gifted at sports in our society? I am proud that I learn almost anything, including sports, quickly. I like to call myself "apt." That sounds less pretentious than "gifted" to me. I am really glad to have found some other gifted people (and thank you for commenting on my blog!) and I am so glad to have found out that traits I just thought of as weakness are in the same cluster as the traits I'm proud of, like my extra sensitivity. I wonder what exactly is going on in our brains, probably chemically, possibly structurally? to have such a broad effect? Hmmm...
There I've just outed myself in more ways than one. What do you think? (Do I have to say a bunch of smart stuff now?)
Monday, December 12, 2005
You are 'Silent Night'! You really enjoy Christmas, and you like your Christmases conventional. For you, Christmas is about family and traditions, and you rather enjoy the rituals of going to church at midnight and turning off the lights before flaming the plum pudding. Although you find Christmas shopping frustrating, you like the excitement of wrapping and hiding presents, and opening a single door on the Advent Calendar each day. You like the traditional carols, and probably teach the children to sing along to them. More than anyone else, you will probably actually have a merry Christmas.
Take this quiz!
Found via Ministrare who is getting in the spirit.
Sunday, December 11, 2005
Well, here you are... You have tried everything that you know to get ahead, thrive, and build a future and it isn't working. All you are now doing is surviving, check to check, moment by moment, emergency by emergency. It's just not the way you want to live your life. You're right, you can do better.Thanks, Joel. You know why I like Amazon? All the reviews. That was a genius move on their part because that's the reason I go there. I got to Joel's list from the book How to Get Out of Debt, Stay Out of Debt, and Live Prosperously by Jerrold Mundis, which I am now going to go get at the library.
Update: I went and got the tape at the library and it is good so far, but he wants me to track all my spending. Damn! Why is awareness always the first step?
Friday, December 09, 2005
It looks like Ian McEwan's Saturday and Kazuo Ishiguro's Never Let Me Go topped the poll, with four votes apiece.Personally, I have to thumb through a fiction book really carefully. I don't read much fiction any more and have the bar set really high for a world I am about to get absorbed in. I am willing to go to an alright movie, but it better be a 5 star book (fiction that is.)
Forget 2005, what is/are your favorite fiction book/s of all time? (Please! I need a good read for my long pre-Christmas travel day!)
Well, tonight I invented another in my long string of already invented items: a tag based calendar, like unto del.icio.us. I figured that someone else already thought of it, they did, and they already built it too. Check out Eventful. Oh and there are other tag based calendars on the way. I'm sad about losing the possible fame and fortune, but I'm glad my idea turned out so well. :)
Thursday, December 08, 2005
If procrastination keeps you form being as productive as you want or need to be, there are some tricks you can use to overcome procrastination. These tricks involve making the activities you procrastinate on
* More Simple
* More Pleasant
* More Interesting
Monday, December 05, 2005
In the last few days, however, you’ve shown so much more interest in doing it yourself, and your father and I have screamed ourselves hoarse trying to encourage you. The other night you were walking back and forth between us when the dog came upstairs to see what all the unnecessary screaming was about, couldn’t we be quiet because he was downstairs in the dark putting on black mascara and dying his fur with Koolaid. When he saw you coming at him upright with your E.T. waddle he whipped his head around to give me a look that said, “You’re shitting me. When did this happen? And why are you letting her do that?”There's more. And it gets better. "putting on black mascara and dying his fur with Koolaid"?! Yes, yes, exactly! Ok, she's brilliant.
...don’t let Hollywood convince you that being fat means that you have to be lonely. Loneliness is caused by isolating yourself from people, not from your body shape. If you are lonely, it'’s not because you're fat. Promise yourself that you will do something today to alleviate your loneliness (join a club, call an old friend, volunteer your time). Then, when you get to goal weight, you won't have the shocking discovery that thin people get lonely too.Like, Laura, my aunt R. often speaks truth to the lie of fat equaling loneliness. She tells me about friends she has that are lonely and think they need to lose weight to find love. The truth is, lots of people with fat on their bodies have love in their lives. Whatever your many flaws may be, and don't we all have a lot of them, don't wait. Don't wait to reach out to someone, don't wait to do something you really enjoy, don't wait to go swimming in the ocean or dancing. Ok?! Don't wait! Love yourself, and let someone else love you, now.
Sunday, December 04, 2005
Thursday, December 01, 2005
Wednesday, November 30, 2005
- I highly reccomend Prairie Home Companion. It is listened to by people all over the country every week. In my family it was a tradition to listen and I still listen to it. Not only do they have contemporary music, the show gives the real flavor of many types of average people in America. (You can listen to the archives online and listen to the current show Sat night and Sun morning.)
- In Utah I listened to KRCL. Because the DJs are all volunteers, they have an eclectic mix of music.
- NPR has a music show called All Songs Considered. They are also starting a new feature where they are podcasting their Open Mike which is a program which features unsigned artists. I haven't listened to Open Mike yet. Their tastes are pretty current, so it might take some getting used to if you like the classics. In the archives, you can listen to the staff and listener picks for the best songs of 2004.
Tuesday, November 29, 2005
Monday, November 28, 2005
The big one, in descending order of cost
- Ecologically built house in a co-housing neighborhood by the mountains and the sea, in the country near a city, close enough that I can ride to it on a bike, or a train. :)
- Ecologically built house
- Very small condo
- New computer! A tablet pc (sorry mac, but I want a tablet.)
- Video camera
- Digital camera
- Voice recorder
- A combo CD player, tape player, and radio that has good quality sound and is fairly small.
- A tempurpedic mattress. (I have one of the pillows and I like it, but I think I need a softer one.)
- A softer tempurpedic like pillow.
- New fuel-efficient, part-electrically powered car
- Oil change
- General check up
- Air conditioning
- CD player for my current car
- Tape player for my current car
- Training with Steve Andreas (seriously, I really want to take all these trainings.)
- Personal Sessions with Steve Andreas
- Personal Sessions with Connirae Andreas
- A haircut from Devachan salon or a certified Devachan hair stylist
- The Five Keys to Permanent Stress Reduction by Neil Fiore
- The Science of Fitness with Tamilee: I Want That Body! by Tamilee Webb -ok I couldn't wait, I just bought this for myself today. A steel butt by Christmas! Actually, I did start using this over two years ago. I paused the video during the intro to look at Tamilee's little half moon butt on the TV screen. I stared at it while thinking positive half-moon butt thoughts. She used weights during the piddly 15 minute work out. I was training for a marathon at the time and could not get through the whole 15 minutes even without weights! I swear to you that within 3 or 4 times of doing the video I lost 3 inches off my booty. And I did eventually get a perfect half-moon butt! It was amazing. Then I had to stare at my own butt in awe. A friend told me with true feeling in her voice that she loved my butt. I eventually moved to the longer Firm videos. Now my butt looks like a large ballooning doughy lump of dough, starting to dribble down the back of my legs (seriously, this all is more than I intended to write) and I don't have the time or inclination to do the whole Firm videos anymore, so I'm going back to my half-moon roots. (Hey! If I ever start a production company, I can call it Half-Moon Productions! In honor of my booty's glory days!)
- Making Friends with Death : A Buddhist Guide to Encountering Mortality by Judith L. Lief
- Writing Your Dissertation in Fifteen Minutes a Day: A Guide to Starting, Revising, and Finishing Your Doctoral Thesis by Joan Bolker
- City Comforts: How to Build an Urban Village, Revised Edition by David Sucher
- Creating Optimism : A Proven, 7-Step Program for Overcoming Depression by Alicia Fortinberry
Hair Products (Thank you to the great site Curly Links for the list)
- TRESemme Conditioners - Vitamin E Moisture Rich or Pro Vitamin B5 & Aloe Remoisturizing or Vitamin E & Aloe Colour Revitalizing
- Aussie Moist Conditioner
- Soft Sheen Carson Optimum Care Stay Strong Conditioner
- DevaCurl Conditioners
Buy from NaturallyCurly.com's CurlMart
Buy from Devachan Salon
- TRESemme Smooth De-Frizzing Moisture Gel
- TRESemme Tres Gel Clean-Hold
- LaBella Lots of Curls Extra Hold Styling Gel
I have a friend who usually does not want anyone to give him conventional gifts. He thinks they are too commercial. He often gives handmade gifts and requests the same. For his birthday he asked for homemade gifts from the heart and got some great gifts. So, besides books, an ecologically built house, and styling gel, I would love homemade gifts or other gifts from your heart.
Most of the things I get complimented on were gifts from my gracious family. Their generosity is everywhere.
Merry (planning for) Christmas!
Want to create your own wishlist without all the copy and pasting? Here are some wishlist sites (untested by me.)
Sunday, November 27, 2005
"How I was brought up and my imaginary friend means more to me than anything you can ever say or do."
Believing there's no God stops me from being solipsistic. I can read ideas from all different people from all different cultures. Without God, we can agree on reality, and I can keep learning where I'm wrong. We can all keep adjusting, so we can really communicate. I don't travel in circles where people say, "I have faith, I believe this in my heart and nothing you can say or do can shake my faith." That's just a long-winded religious way to say, "shut up," or another two words that the FCC likes less. But all obscenity is less insulting than, "How I was brought up and my imaginary friend means more to me than anything you can ever say or do." So, believing there is no God lets me be proven wrong and that's always fun. It means I'm learning something.
Believing there is no God means the suffering I've seen in my family, and indeed all the suffering in the world, isn't caused by an omniscient, omnipresent, omnipotent force that isn't bothered to help or is just testing us, but rather something we all may be able to help others with in the future. No God means the possibility of less suffering in the future.
Saturday, November 26, 2005
I remember when I lived in a small town where some people were prejudiced against other races, religions, and environmentalists, (which they used as a dirty word.) I used to argue with my friends about EVERYTHING. I thought they were lucky I would be their friend. Then I realized that I was lucky they would be my friend! I was the odd duck out and they still befriended me. I decided to pick my battle and let beef eating, hunting, environmentalism etc.. go and only speak up strongly to any kind of hate speech. I thought of this as a compromise, as a nod to the part of me who yearns to be accepted socially. Maybe if I was stronger and was willing to be alone, I could fight all of the battles.
Well, I'm glad that I yearn to be one of the people, because I am one of the people! (As idiotic as I think some people are sometimes.) I now live and associate with people who are more like me, and that is less stressful, but I learned a lot from those friends who were different. A, they were a lot of fun! We had fun in the mountains of a small town. They enjoyed life. Amazingly, even though their words could sometimes be prejudiced, I learned a lot about tolerance from them. I mean, they were friends with me, even when I was arguing all the time. They accepted people as they were. You could be eccentric, very eccentric, and still belong. My philosophy was more tolerant, but it could sometimes be as a "sounding gong" in practice, as I constantly, and I'm sure annoyingly, set people straight. Thankfully, through my self-imposed diplomacy, I was able to get close enough to really get to know those neat people. I developed a new philosophy of tolerance that I could use in practice, and when I use it, it serves me well.
My goal is to love people and be for people, instead of holding off and feeling like I have to fight against people. When I feel love for people, it's like people just flock to me and I don't have to do anything. But I still get afraid, especially if I think other people just don't understand something and it is urgent that I tell them. I have seen a reappearance of my battle fighting self at school lately. In fact, just this morning I had a dream that I was at a long table and kept interrupting people to correct them. It was a compulsion. Everytime I did it, I knew it wasn't the best way. I put my head down on my arm and sighed.
This is for anyone else who gets a savior complex every now and then. This is for me. So, here is what I have learned since having buddies who took me digging (driving a truck in deep mud,) called me over to watch their goslings hatch, played WWF (wrestling) on mattresses in the livingroom, argued with me about milk, and thoughtfully did not kill any animals when I was along for the ride:
- Everyone has something valuable to give, even if it is not apparent at first. So, pre-emptively giving people respect will be the most accurate approach.
- Assume that people have good intentions and are intelligent when you are trying to understand them and you will usually understand people who have very different opinions than yours much more accurately.
- Tell yourself, "I don't have to fix everything. I do not have to be the savior of the world or even of the people in my immediate vicinity. People will eventually get it," (whatever "it" is to you.) "They will be ok." (This is the part that takes faith, opposite of fear kind of faith.)
- No matter how sensible and enlightened your values and opinions are, people will not want to be around you or listen to you if you are angry, miserable and treat them with contempt.
- And a positive version of the statement above: People will listen to you and want to learn more about your ways if you live a joyful life and love them. That is an easy, joyful way to be influential.
Thursday, November 24, 2005
H is for "O Hell," the things I forgot,
A is for aneurysm, so worry no more,
N is for NASA! Go out and explore!
K is for kumquat. I'll love you kumquat may.
Y is for you you, on Thanksgiving Day.
O is for opal, expensive and shiny.
U is for "Uh oh! Now I get to say 'Hiny!'"
Believe it or not, I was going to write a serious post about everything I'm grateful for, but when you title a post "'T' is for Thank you," what else can you do?
Happy Thanksgiving to you, you and you!! :)
Wednesday, November 23, 2005
This morning while dropping a friend off at the airport, I heard three good car songs. (Luckily I heard them during the alone parts of the journey; the best time to turn up the radio and pretend I'm tough in my four door wagon.)
(The music links will take you to Amazon, if you scroll down, you'll see where you can listen to a thirty second clip.)
- Seven Nation Army by the White Stripes better known to me as "I'm going to WICHITA! DA, da da DA DA"
- Possum Kingdom by the Toadies a song that gives me a guilty rush of pleasure to sing. It's a bad song, but it feels so good. :)
- Que' Onda Guero by Beck first time I heard it, but destined to be a good Dance Jam song if nothing else.
Monday, November 21, 2005
What Should I Do With My Life?
...you'll be a lot happier if you aren't fighting the value system around you. Find one that enforces a set of beliefs that you can really get behind. There's a powerful transformative effect when you surround yourself with like-minded people.
Thursday, November 17, 2005
Wednesday, November 16, 2005
The Rosedale Diet update
I am liking it. The biggest problem is that I have to plan, and because of the nature of the diet there are not many convenience foods except nuts, which I have now had enough of. I'm going shopping tonight.
The upside: I can see my shape starting to take shape (yahoo,) having to plan forces me to shop and cook in advance which is really nice come hungry, busy weekdays.
Sidenote: I am getting into one of those interesting mindsets that I don't often occupy where I enjoy the discipline of not eating certain things. Weird. I imagine that this is how people with eating disorders live their life. On the other hand, not so weird. I enjoy the discipline of other things. You can't have a game without rules.
The confession: Three times now I have gone off the diet. I had the best of intentions and just ended up in situations where I was hungry and there was nothing else to eat. (see: big project... hours, and hours, and hours...) Hey, I like discipline, but a girls gotta eat.
Best to ya'll!
Thursday, November 10, 2005
There are a lot of other factors besides being gifted that affect where and how a person can best fit in and give to society. To maximize the fit of all those variable that make up a person, it's important to
- know your self,
- be clear about your intentions, and
- be able to regulate your self.
Where self-knowledge comes in is putting myself in situations that most value what I have to give. I think that is good advice for everyone. If you give something perceived as valuable, you will be valued. (Maybe that is part of Jo's question. Where will gifted adults most be valued?)
That's my practical answer. I think in reality, sometimes you are bursting at the seams to give your gift, and you must give it, whether or not it is valued. I'm thinking of Van Gogh, and a thousand other musicians and artists and writers. The thing is to know yourself, and be clear about your intentions. I don't think it will work to tell society, "Please value me!" Nor do I want to do that. I do think that it is reasonable to provide support for everyone to help them learn how to balance their needs, including self-expression and belonging.
How do you balance your needs for self-expression and your need for belonging? Do those needs converge in your life or do they pull you in different directions?
Wednesday, November 09, 2005
It is often difficult for young people to understand the segregated United States of the mid-20th century, when black citizens often lived in poverty, had substandard housing, were given poor-quality public educations, and were disenfranchised as voters. With the passing of Parks and the fight for racial equality that she symbolized, such subjects are now relics of a bygone era.Ok, now back to work. (For me! Not you! You go ahead and meander and do no work you lazy... oops, I've just officially read too many Onion articles.)
Now, if you have a half-baked theory that you'd like to disclose, please be so kind as to skirt around the issue. I'll only listen to your elaborate webs of presumption and hearsay if you promise to veer unexpectedly and pointlessly off course at every opportunity. Prose density is part of what makes a half-baked theory fascinating.
Only last week, my friend Janet gave me a book that teaches how, through a diet of salmon and romaine lettuce, you can shave 20 years off your appearance. However, before we got to the hard-core salmon-and-lettuce, face-lifting theory, I was taken through a series of anecdotes, solicited testimonials, and long-winded circular logic proving the author's qualifications by citing the medical establishment's fear of his simple brilliance. It was an eye-opener.
Monday, November 07, 2005
I love that I'm finding validating writing about gifted characteristics. As many of you know, it can be hard when the way you are is not normal, especially if you can't quite figure out why. However, some of the writing just isn't practical and elevates some characteristics that don't seem to warrant it. Some of the advice is basically: "The world should learn to value these characteristics." Well, that's helpful.
I think it is important to value and accept yourself. I also think it is important to take responsibility for yourself if you want to get the results you want. So, I propose that gifted folks just need to learn to be super self-regulators. That's what we are doing anyway when we are ultra-critical of ourselves and ultra-sensitive. I guess we just need to be informed self-regulators. Value all of our characteristics, and just know in which contexts they will get us the results we want. The prevalence of loneliness in the gifted is not right! If our gifts are keeping us from some of the best of what life has to offer, I would hardly call them gifts. Let's use our brains to get the sweetest marrow of living.
I've been wanting to take Michael Hall's workshop about personal mastery for awhile, but I'm a bigger fan of the clarity of Steve Andreas's thinking. Maybe Steve can present at Seng's next conference, and all us bloggers can go there and meet!
Sunday, November 06, 2005
Here is a list of characteristics that are common to gifted adults, sans the references. You can read the rest of the article here.
A broad knowledge base and seemingly insatiable need for new information that is associated with an insatiable intellectual curiosity. Critical self-scrutiny and self-monitoring. Verbal agility, remarkable expressiveness, and a penchant for in-depth discussion and debate. Exceptionally high standards, idealism, perfectionism, and intense self-criticism. Preference for complexity and novelty and a tolerance of ambiguity. Excitability, multiple interests, high levels of energy... Love of challenge motivated by an intrinsic drive toward fulfillment of potential, meaningful living, and self-actualization. Distinct need for autonomy. Heightened physiological sensitivity and sensory arousal. Feelings of loneliness and emotional distance despite positive relationships and even popularity. Emotional sensitivity and extraordinary responsiveness. History of frustration related to asynchronous development — ability to visualize or conceptualize the desired creative product preceding the attainment of obligatory skills. Compassion, moral integrity and courage, wisdom, global awareness, and potential for humanitarian leadership.
Saturday, November 05, 2005
My experience: So far my biggest fear of being hungry has been realized, all because of lack of planning. I also feel a little weird. I don't know how to describe it, I don't have the icky low blood sugar feeling, but I do feel carb-deprived.
- A Diet Blog weighs in about the Rosedale Diet.
- L. Robinson's personal experience with the diet over at free dieting.
- A Blogger is documenting her experience on her blog (named Rosedale.) She started in September.
- Jonni Good blogs about trying out the Rosedale.
- A Rosedale Diet yahoo group that you don't have to join to read.
- A Mixed review over at Everydiet.
- A list of the allowed foods by NC... from a discussion at low carb friends.
- A Threaded discussion about the RD also from low carb friends.
- Dr. Mercola gives Dr. Rosedale props. (Dr. Mercola loves Dr. Rosedale, Dr. Mercola loves Dr. Rosedale...)
Friday, November 04, 2005
Hey, did I mention that the other day was my MOM'S BIRTHDAY?! I didn't think so. Even worse, I haven't sent her a present yet. If you see this, D, Happy Birthday!!! Your daughter loves you! :)
While I'm on the topic, I'll just brag about my mom for a minute. Let's see, she ran a 50 mile race this year, she came in second, which was disappointing, because last time she ran she came in FIRST!! She is brilliant and got a math scholarship to college, which she went to when she was 16. She sometimes does not think she is as brilliant as she is (see: "came in second" above.)
She is usually pretty quiet in group settings and people find her amiable and likeable. She can become fascinated with things like bugs and genealogy; she's in touch with her inner nerd. She also has a very earthy side and likes to hike, run, and be outdoors. I know this sounds a little like a personal, but I'm sorry, she is already married. She is married to a semi-southern all gentleman who perfectly suits her. Whenever I think about him I just fill up with gratitude that they found each other. Thanks, B, for being my mom's honey. Thanks Grandma and Granddad for having my mom.
Thursday, November 03, 2005
Tuesday, November 01, 2005
There seem to be five traits that produce potential interpersonal and intrapersonal conflict: divergency, excitability, sensitivity, perceptivity, and entelechy...These traits seem to be an integral part of giftedness; however, the behavioral manifestations of these traits may vary depending on other physiological and personality factors, such as tolerance for ambiguity, degree of introversion or extroversion, and preference for particular types of sensory input.Check out the rest of Can you hear the flowers sing? Issues for gifted adults by Deirdre V. Lovecky, (who I now love forever.) Found via A Mindful Life. And check out the PDF with lots of gifted adult stuff at Gifted Problems. I found the following quote there.
Although the traits in themselves are neutral, their behavioral manifestations make them socially and emotionally significant. For example, the trait of sensitivity can be manifested as empathy, commitment, touchiness, intensity, or vulnerability. Thus, in any individual, the sum of the behavioral manifestations may be viewed as positive or negative.
Unique interpersonal challenges that gifted individuals, couples and families encounter during their life span include learning to interact in the mainstream world; manage expectations and pressures to fit the norm; defuse unconscious hostility, resentment, antagonism and sabotage directed at them because they are perceived as intellectually, creatively or personally advantaged; set appropriate boundaries for the utilization of their abilities; collaborate with others, and manage the daily dilemmas of giftedness involving relatives, bosses, co-workers, neighbors, counselors, teachers and other members of the community.Read more articles about Gifted and Talentedness :) at Seng.org.
Monday, October 31, 2005
Some of the traditional practices of this multi-layered season have been made playful. We laugh in the face of death, wear costumes that play on our fears, and give away sweets to traveling bands of eager children, who threaten us with tricks unless we give them treats. Just under the surface of our playful pumpkins, costumes, parties and decorations, lies our biggest human anxiety: we die and so do those we love. Eventually, we will cross that veil into whatever it is that lies on the other side, and what that is, we cannot know.Check out the rest of Ministrare's post about Fall and ancestors. It is really lovely.
May you enjoy the beauty and breadth of Fall today; the bustling of costumed children, and the magic of adults playing dress-up. May the smell of hot apple cider and pumpkin spices cross your path, and may the nearness of death make you take a deep spicy breath full of life.
Sunday, October 30, 2005
Via: It's all one thing.
|This Is My Life, Rated|
|Take the Rate My Life Quiz|
Here they are:
- A very funky way to add categories to blogger, and where it all began.
- How to make a drop down menu for categories
- 3 ways to use del.icio.us for categories in blogger
- And the easiest one of all from Orangewise: "Using blogsearch it is pretty easy to have simple categories on your blogspot."
Does anyone know of any more ways? Does anyone have an "in" with the Blogger people so we can just convince them to make Blogger category enabled? Are you even working on it Blogger people?? (Don't get angry, Blogger-gods, I appreciate all the free bounty. I'm just askin.)
Oh, oh, and check it out! People even have theories about categories! Check out this article by Clay Shirky on Categories, Links, and Tags. I decided to actually read it, and it's fascinating, especially if you get a little anal about your ontology.
Friday, October 28, 2005
Thursday, October 27, 2005
Really, a lot of what I do in my life is internal. Some years when it might have looked like I was accomplishing nothing, I was actually working really hard, going to therapy and doing other internal transformation work. Many of my goals have to do with how I'm feeling and the processes I use and how I think. I feel like it's my soul journey. So, this summer I decided that I wanted and needed to focus on my soul journey again, thus began: The Summer of Transformation!
I am making progress. Soul journey progress is always faster and slower than I think it will be. Faster because the slow and steady inner work I do can change everything in my outer life nearly instantly. Slower because I feel impatient and want to hurry and do inner work which is just opposite of how inner work goes, for me anyway. For me, inner changes are usually a result of practices, very slow and steady practices like writing in my journal or just being with myself and noticing how I am feeling. By their very nature, they can't be hurried through. One result that I am noticing is greater self-acceptance and a feeling that my desires are good. Oh, that feels refreshing. It's such a little seeming shift, but it is huge. When you know you can trust yourself, you don't have to fight with yourself. (Especially pertinant for people who relate to the enneagram personality type 1.)
This is one of my favorite poems in that vein.
Wednesday, October 26, 2005
Someone in class said that faith is the opposite of reason. I disagree. I think faith is the opposite of fear. Most people who have faith or religion as a part of their lives also use reason, and are willing to let other people see things in a different way. I think fundamentalism rises when fear rises, as the video showed so well. Some of the fear is a natural response to poverty, feeling powerless to become a part of the mainstream, and to a rapidly changing world. As we saw in the video, fear is often spurred on by disingenuous leaders. In contrast, I saw the leaders who were sincere encouraging and uplifting people when they spoke to them.
I used to be confused by the religious right because they say they are followers of Jesus Christ, and yet, as a group, they are in favor of using guns and war. They often seem angry and hateful. Now I’m not confused by it. Their expression of Christianity is an expression of fearful fundamentalism, just like fundamentalists of other religions, not the expression of people following a century old leader who says to “turn the other cheek.” The video emphasized the similarities between fundamentalists from different religions when it showed fundamentalist Jewish people in Israel at a shooting range. If you take away their yarmulkes, they would look like stereotypical Christian fundamentalists who belong to the NRA.
I don’t think there is a split between world religions. I don’t think there is a split between being religious and using technology or being scientific. I think there is a split between fundamentalism and faith, between clinging to the past and moving forward with hope. Pat Robinson and the Ayatollah Khomeini, and other fear mongering leaders, have much more in common with each other than they do with faithful followers of their respective religions. I don’t think fundamentalism is a matter of individual character flaws either. I think fundamentalism rises out of fear which is a natural reaction to very real outer circumstances. It is also a reaction to imagined outer circumstances. Pat Robinson gave a terrific example of fear mongering on the video, when he told his Christian audience that atheists and humanists were out to hunt them down.
With all my heart I believe in democracy and believe that people should be allowed to worship how, where, and what they may. I think any force fighting for a theocracy is inherently unfaithful and fearful. To ensure that we all continue to be able to freely and responsibly search for meaning, and continue to have many other freedoms, I think we need to make individual changes, and policy changes. Politically, and in business we need to act with the knowledge that having “haves” and the “never-have-a chance-of-havings” is dangerous to everyone. We don’t need to be compassionate to work for a flatter world. (Although I think compassion is soul healing.) We just need to have a reasoned assessment of what is in our own self interest. I think we need to do everything we can on a policy level to allow everyone in the game. On an individual level, I hope we will all contribute to the environment of hope rather than fear. One way to do this is to see our underlying similarities and avoid demonizing other people. Another way to do this is to be careful what we put in our minds. For example, we can choose to watch real news, and refuse to support fear mongering. Education, one of my personal favorites, is also a good solution to fear, especially for the people who are mostly making choices based on imagined fears.
Something I really admire about the British is how they responded in WW II. They were under attack and they could have easily been overcome by Nazi forces, but they rallied together as a country. They didn’t give up, they made sure their cities were blacked out, and took their street signs down so an invading army would get lost. I think their tenacity saved them. In our individual lives and as a society, our courage has saved us again and again, and will continue to do so. I think we are in a time that exemplifies the saying that “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”
- A wikipedia article with an overview about what knowledge management is.
- Amy Gahran takes a more in depth look at what a PKM is and why we need it.
- Dave Pollard imagines his perfect km system, complete with a diagram and an explanation. I surfed to many of the links on this page from the comments on this post.
- Haystack says it is the "Universal information client." You can check out the screen shots and see if you get what that means on a practical level.
- Tinderbox: an application for the mac that uses XML.
- Content Saver: "Software for web research and information gathering."
- Omea is a free rss and atom feed reader which comes with more organizing abilities with the paid version.
- Onfolio has an educational version which copies and organizes pdfs into searchable versions and works with endnote.
- Smart Channel says it is a tool which would make it possible to use your blog or "channel" as a km system.
- Read about a BBC experiment which allows users to tag a page. There is a prototype you can try it out on. This is a very cool idea.
- Amy Gahran has some crazy (like a fox :) ideas about sparking creativity with a km system.
- Eva Kaplan-Leiserson has a list of links that pertain to KM. I found some good stuff there including the above link to Amy Gahran.
- An interesting post from Rashni Sinha about the cognitive processes involved in tagging.
Tuesday, October 25, 2005
I had a great time and I think it was largely due to me respecting my princesshood. Yes, I'm a closet princess. It all started when I was little and my family used to call me a little princess, and they didn't mean it as a compliment. I even had a shirt which said, "Little Princess" on it. It was pink with sparkles, I wore it backwards so I could see the words. I remember wearing it when I visited my step-brother in prison, and I still have it in my cedar chest.
I also read "The Little Princess." It sparked many a fantasy and I, being jealous of the little Princess, thought she got her comeuppance when she had to go live in the attic. But then, she did treat the little servant girl kindly, and I was glad when she got rescued by the monkey. Why, oh why, couldn't a monkey rescue me?! But I digress.
After being accused of being a little princess, I had to put my tiara and all my pink girlishness under wraps. It wasn't until I was in my mid-twenties that I started to reframe my princessness. I moved in with two other princesses. They were more clearly princesses, and one day my roommate came home with a skirt that twirled. "Oh, I love skirts that twirl!" I said. "Of course you do," she said assuringly, "all princesses love skirts that twirl." Yes, she knew I was a princess too. Believe it or not, it was a revelatory moment for me. I just sat there, (on the bathroom floor, as it happens,) stunned. I mean, my mouth was open and my eyes were wide. I was a princess too, and it was ok.
Monday, October 24, 2005
I put in "Elderly Woman Behind The Counter in a Small Town" by Pearl Jam. You know, the one that goes, "hearts and thoughts they fade, fade away..." The first song they played for me was Donegal Express by Shane MacGowen and the Popes. You can give the song thumbs up or down, buy it, or make a new playlist. You can aso find out the answer to "Why this song?" The answer in this case:
...Because it features folk influences, mild rhythmic syncopation, melodic songwriting, major key tonality, and a twelve-eight time signature.Hmm. Cool! I might have another entry for my Christmas list. Now I'm just wondering what songs I should put in. Any suggestions?
Sunday, October 23, 2005
From Gifted Adults by Lynne M. Azpeitia:
The Role of the Therapist & Coach with Gifted Adults(The colors are mine.) Check out the rest of the article at Gifted-Adults.com.
Gifted adults work best with therapists and coaches who collaborate with them. Collaborating is key because gifted adults are independent thinkers who maintain an internal locus of control and do not automatically adopt or rely on the opinions of authority figures for direction or instruction on what to do or how to do it.
While gifted adults may respect a therapist or coach’s ability and experience, they also respect their own. Any suggestion, solution or direction offered to them will be thoroughly considered on its own merits and if selected, customized to the gifted adult’s own situation. It is very important that the therapist or coach not take this personally if they are going to work with gifted adults.